An Interesting Adventure

Experience is a hard teacher

Thursday, November 1, 2007

We were told that round three and subsequent odd numbered courses of the treatment for Burkitt's would be tough. We had no idea just how tough. Of course, I have no experiential knowledge, only the pain of watching Marsh as he is physically laid low.

We all know Marsh is a fighter, but he's not fighting so much right now. And we have been assured that things will be getting worse before they're better. So, dear Friends, please lift him up. Pray for peace and strength and spirit. Pray for the healing of positive attitude and an infusion of will.

The cancer diagnosis was hard. The cure is far more difficult. The results will be worth it all.

For Marsh, and for the hundreds of thousands – millions? – of others facing physical trials nearly beyond their capacity to bear, give thanks for God's mercy and grace.

--c.

The light isn't moving...

Sunday, November 4, 2007

Well, there's light at the end of the tunnel, and it's no longer a moving train. According to Dr. Porcu -- whom we're recommending for saint-hood, by the way -- the worst is over for this round. Marsh is starting the slo-o-o-ow process of stablizing enough to go home again (in a week or so). While his lab results show the right trends for eliminating the methotrexate, the fine balance for kidneys is a little precarious. And that pesky white count, especially the neutrophils, has begun to dive right on schedule. So, still no visitors, but we'd sure appreciate continuing prayer.

Grateful for any improvement and clinging to God's promises,

--c.

One forward, two back...

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

On Sunday, Dr. Porcu said the worst (of the mucositis) was over. Unfortunately, other parts of Marsh's body had different plans: he developed pneunomia yesterday and, while he is better today, it has been a setback. All health-care forces are mustered, attempting to establish a balance of meds and reactions, blood counts and system functions. Still, we are so fearfully and wonderfully made that it is a complicated and interdependent situation.

Perhaps most disturbing is the temporary effect the fever, meds, blood levels, and infection are having on Marsh's thinking...and he knows he's caught in the nightmare. But, in time, this, too, will pass.

Marsh's Brain on Chemo

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

If you know Marsh, you know that his mind was already a strange and wonderful place...

Marsh's brain on chemo is exponentially interesting. He describes it in terms of audio or video tracks:

Reality -- life as it's happening -- is on track one, but the chemo slows it down by a milisecond.

His chemo brain is track two. It attempts to process the life track. But it's at variable speed, sometimes running precariously ahead of "reality," and sometimes delayed, which gives him extended -- and frustrating -- periods of deja vu.

Track three is "a bunch of really wierd stuff" that surfaces randomly, interrupting both life and his processing of it.

Not a bad analogy!

Marsh says this round has given him a lot of time for soul searching. I asked if he liked was he saw, and he replied that he'd have to get back to me on that.

When the pain team came in to assess his status (re: the mucositis), they asked him the usual series of questions:

On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain?

Three at its best, seven at its worst.

Any nausea or vomiting?

No.

Any headache or dizzyness?

No.

Any confusion?

Why would you ask a confused person if he is confused? Don't you get a lot of false-positives?

That's Marsh.

A New Normal

Friday, November 9, 2007

Individuals who experience life-altering events -- from the birth of a child to combat to cancer -- come to the realization that "normal" ain't what it used to be. Life can't be the same for them or for the people who love them.

Faced with that realization, they can long for the good old days; attempt to impose previous parameters; ignore it all, coast and let life happen; or consider embracing a new Normal.

Last evening Dr. Porcu suggested that we should start thinking about "life on the other side of this." He was the second person that day to bring up the subject.

Hmmm.

So, okay, God. What is Your new normal for Marsh? For Carol? For us together? For the family?

That's the bell!

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

That's the bell, and it's the end of Round 3!

At least that's what we're hoping to hear today or tomorrow.

With that, Marsh will be home. And what's more, he'll get to stay for -- wait for it -- ten days. Yes, folks, that means through Thanksgiving.

Praise God from Whom all blessings flow!
--c.

An Unscheduled Stop

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Marsh was home from 4:00 pm, Tuesday (Nov. 13) until 10:00 am, today when he returned to The James for scheduled blood work. Unfortunately, during that time, his mouth sores worsened, and he still could not eat. Plus he had no interest in anything digital: TV, email, computer games, music... That's serious, Folks!

Needless to say, Nurse Practitioner Carol took one look and slapped him back into the hospital. It's an unscheduled but undoubtedly short-lived stop, and he should be back home for Thanksgiving.

Prayer request? For his physical and mental rebuilding and stamina.

Thanks
--c.

Today We're Praising!

Saturday, November 17, 2007

While Marsh would say that Burkitt's treatment "Round 3 kicked [his] butt," today's news is indeed a silver lining to all the clouds he's been struggling to clear: his PET scan shows that the softball-sized tumor in his abdomen is gone!

THANK YOU, GOD.

Does that mean he's done with chemo? Absolutely not. Still four rounds to go, but suddenly that prospect is much more bearable.

Pray on, Dear Friends, but please begin each prayer with thanksgiving.

--c.

From Our Home to Yours

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Marsh is home, and this time he seems fit enough that it should last a while. The Docs have even decided to give us an extra day: he returns to Dr. Porcu's office early Tuesday, Nov. 27, and will likely be admitted to begin Round 4.

Until then, we have a lot of Thanksgiving to do.

So, to the Source of Creation, all praise and glory!

And to you and yours, may you be blessed to be a blessing.

The Williams Family

I'm home...

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

I woke up this morning in my own bed. That's about as good as it gets. I'll try to catch up from the patient's perspective over the next few days, but for now...I'm home that's all that needs to be said.